
Posted on 08/25/2013 at 10:21 AM in A Coaching Moment, Life Coaching | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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Warning: About to get on my soap box around the concept of "failure" again. I have experienced a few traditionally translated "failures" over the past few months so I have been considering this topic quite deeply lately.
I was recently watching Bob Mankoff's Ted.com talk, Anatomy of a New Yorker Cartoon. (Aside: It is very funny. Worth the click and watch!) Bob is the New Yorker magazine's esteemed cartoon editor and has been since 1980. Between the years 1974 and 1977, he submitted 2,000 cartoons to the New Yorker and was rejected every time. Every time. Not one in three or even one in 12, but 2,000 times. Think about that a moment. Seriously. How many times would you submit before you threw in the towel? Honestly, I am thinking 10 tops. This guy stuck to it and three years later he became the editor and has been the editor now for over 30 years. Awesome!
Thomas Edison (and his staff, I will add) supposedly took two years and used up over 6,000 filaments in experimenting with perfecting the lightbulb.
A reporter came asked Edison, "How many times are you going to fail at creating the light bulb?" Mr. Edison replied, "Son, I haven't failed! I've simply discovered another way not to invent the light bulb!"
Again, I ask you, how many times would you have attempted it before giving up? 100 seems like alot, but 6,000?
Jack Canfield and Victor Hansen, creators of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, were turned down by 162 publishers even with an affidavit signed by 20,000 people who promised to buy the book once it was published! When the book was finally published, it went on to become the best selling series of all time AND the first book to sell a million copies in one day. Is this failure?
In the 2000 presidential elections, George W. Bush was elected as president despite receiving fewer popular votes than Al Gore, the runner-up. He didn't even have the majority of the American citizens behind him, but he was still our president. He had to get up every day and do his work, knowing that not even the majority wanted him to be doing what he was doing.
Really, all presidents have at some point during their presidency, found their opinion poles not thrilled with them. They face criticism and very strong opinions. Yet, they keep going. They keep doing what they need to do.
You know what I see in all of these examples? People who believe so deeply in themselves and what they are doing that they only see their "failure" as learning what doesn't work. If you think you have failed, you do not believe in yourself enough. Our job is to build our personal strength to be so strong, nothing will shake it. It doesn't matter what others say or think, we know what we are doing is the right thing for us.
Is there a situation from your past that felt like a failure? Is there something going on in your life right now that is hard? Do you feel like you are failing? What can you do to redress them? Can they be lessons learned? A way to strengthen your resolve?
So, in case you are thinking of giving up, which to me is the greatest of failures, let me leave you with two brilliant thoughts from one who knows, Thomas Edison:
Posted on 07/15/2013 at 03:23 PM in A Coaching Moment, Failure | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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Want to make changes in your life faster? Wish you could let go of a an old belief more easily or surrender with more grace? What about experiencing more personal strength? Being able to step into making strong decisions for yourself?
We need to start all of these processes with our minds -- becoming aware of something that needs to change, something that needs to be different. But we don't have to complete the work with our minds and, in fact, our minds can get in the way.
"Why am I here again!"
"Why can't I get past this place?"
"How come I keep making the same mistakes?"
Sounds familiar? We've all done it -- been stuck in our heads, analyzing and reanalyzing whatever challenge we are going through. We may even find ourselves analyzing the thoughts we are having as we analyze! As a Life Coach, i see it over and over again, we just get "stuck in the muck" as I say.
Our minds can only take us so far and, frankly, that is not much past where it has brought us thus far. It is much to easy to be drawn back into our old thinking and I know we have all experienced that in our lives -- the lure of the status quo when you are trying to make changes.
So, what can we do? Use the other layers to our being -- our koshas!
Let's talk koshas. The koshas, or sheaths, are the layers that comprise us. In Yogic thinking, our bodies have five layers, each serving a different purpose:
Each of the layers are intertwined - separate yet inter-connected like the threads in a tapestry. Which means we can create the changes we want to make on a different level then our mind which will then help change the mind. We are very aware of the mind-body connection when we are stressed. When our minds are stressed, the stress transcends to the body because the layers, while seperate, are intertwined.
We can do the same for all the layers of ourselves and a yoga practice can work on all of the layers.
A "well-rounded" yoga practice is one in which we are supporting all of these layers. Just as the poses work the physical body, meditation works the mental body, breathing the energetic body, philosophy the emotional body, and all of them together help us to enter our spiritual body. Let’s look at each one in more detail and how they can help us in manifesting the life of our dreams.
Yoga Poses: Physical
Poses can easily be seen as affecting the physical body. We can use strong standing poses to help us build our foundation, to feel stronger about who we are. We need a strong foundation in order to grow as big as we are desiring. We need a skyscraper foundation, not a one-story rambler. Think about people you know in your own life. Those who are strong, know what they want and go after are firm in their bodies. They step confidently, sure of themselves. We can create that in our own bodies, even if we don't yet feel it, until we do feel it.
Yoga poses can also help us build courage via backbends, gratitude and surrender via forward folds, and letting go through our twists. Our bodies are powerful representations of what is going on in our lives and we can use that fact to consciously move into the life we really want.
Meditation: Higher Mind
Think of a regular meditation practice as a deep mental cleansing of our old beliefs. Simply taking a few minutes each day to quiet our minds and step into a more peaceful place can help us rise above our old thinking, our old thoughts. You know, the thoughts that have gotten us where we are right now? We can begin to take more control of our thoughts through meditation so we can direct them toward more beneficial thoughts, ones that take us where we want to go, not where we've been.
Breathing: Energetic Body
A yogic breathing practice is called Pranayama, and involves focusing on the breath and consciously changing how you are breathing. In Sanskrit, the word “prana” has many meanings: breath, energy, and spirit. It is through this practice that we access our energetic body, our life force. When we focus on our exhales, we are helping our energy body let go, surrender, release, relax. When we focus on our inhales we are receiving, expanding, drawing into our lives.
Since energy is the crux of the Law of Attraction and manifesting, this aspect is a powerful addition to a Manifesting on the Mat practice.
Philosophy: Personality
The final level to add to a complete yoga practice is philosophy. While a Manifesting on the Mat practice doesn't necessarily need philosophy (although I would argue it helps -- another post!), the aspect I do recommend adding is the ability to say, "What if...?" Often when I am teaching a group of people about the basic precepts of yogic philosophy (and it comes up in coaching all the time as well), resistance comes up. A feeling of "Oh, no, this isn't me." (Here's a whole post on Resistance.) I always recommend to people to soften and just say, "What if...?" If you simply disregard something just because it is uncomfortable you will remain forever stuck.
Manifesting on the Mat is a powerful tool toward creating the life you really want...faster! Get all your layers working toward your dreams, not just your mind.
Take your manifesting to your yoga mat: June 1-2
Five Steps (Plus One) for Living Your Extraordinary Life with Yoga!
More information and to Register
Posted on 05/22/2013 at 10:25 AM in A Coaching Moment, Ignite Your Life, Life Coaching, Manifesting, Manifesting on the Mat | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)
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Posted on 05/13/2013 at 11:36 AM in A Coaching Moment, Coaching Thought, Feel Good Moment, Personal Practice Inspiration | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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Posted on 05/05/2013 at 10:18 AM in A Coaching Moment, Coaching Thought, Life Coaching | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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Sigh...resistance. My dictionary defines it as "hostility to, refusal to accept, opposition, fight, stand, struggle". Resistance is our own, personal "fight" against change in our lives and it shows up as mind games that give us "excuses" for not stepping out of our comfort zone, to keep us in our "safe", little box.
Our brain is literally wired to sustain the status quo. Our heart and spirit want to grow and stretch, but our mind wants to keep us in our place. The reason is security. The same mechanism in our brain that keeps us stuck in a job/relationship/habit that is less than fully satisfying, keeps us on the sidewalk when cars are racing past.
I giggle at clients who defend their position, trying to convince me that it isn't them who is resisting, that their excuses are "realistic". I only laugh because I see myself in them. We all do it, we cannot deny it, it is part of the human condition. The trick is to know how to identify it, to be honest with ourselves, so we can move beyond it. Resistance sneaks up on us in a variety of ways. Here's a list from Barbara Stanny (author of a myriad of wonderful books for women and money. My favorite two are: Overcoming Underearning and Secrets of Six-Figure Women) that is simply brilliant. I dare you not to find one you resonate with:
TWELVE SIGNS YOU ARE IN RESISTANCE
By Barbara Stanny
(reproduced with Barbara's permission)
We all do it. (If you find yourself denying it -- it is just resistance! Sorry, couldn't help myself. :-))
Name it and claim it. Accept it. Know you are simply moving into territory that is scary, that's all. And then do something. Yes, get up and do something. Help yourself feel stronger by working on your Personal Strength. Take smaller steps toward your fear. Ask for help. Get more exercise, fresh air, meditation, yoga. Eat more nourishing foods and drink more water. Then, you know what? You will move into your fear spot and you know what you will find? Not only is the world still revolving and you're still alive, but also you are stronger and living more authentically. Now isn't that worth it?
You might also enjoy:
Manifesting: It's all in the feet
Personal Strength: Build it on your yoga mat (article I wrote for YogaGuardian.com)
Posted on 04/18/2013 at 11:25 AM in A Coaching Moment, Coaching Thought, Inspirations, Life Coaching, Personal Strength | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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I am craving simplicy right now. It feels like I see clutter everywhere in my house. This often happens when I am either ready for a consciousness shift or right on the other side of one. I have been shedding old "stuff" right and left. (Read my post, "I'm Freakin' Freakin' Out" for how I have been handling it! And stay tuned...writing a post soon on "Resistance: It's Many Forms".) I have been through this process many times before so I know the signs. I also know that actually clearing away physical clutter in my environment helps me both shift more effortlessly and hold onto the new shift with more grace.
This post is on decluttering because I am about to embark on a 30-Day Declutter Challenge! I have already been doing some of it but decided I could use some company (and a little accountability...). Want to join me? Starting Monday, I am going to commit to decluttering something every day and post it on my Facebook page, Tweet it (#30DayDeclutter), and post photos on Instagram (perhaps even "Before" and "After", depending on how brave I am!) (And, yeah, I'm everywhere -- you can find me on Pinterest and YouTube, too!)
Here are the rules:
You with me? If so, let me know. Would love the company and the inspiration. I am ready!
Posted on 04/11/2013 at 09:24 PM in A Coaching Moment, Life Coaching | Permalink | Comments (18) | TrackBack (0)
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The Universe brings us crazy awesome stuff all the time and without even noticing we push it away. You have to say yes, y'all!
This bracelet is my "You have to say yes" bracelet. I actually call it by that name and wear it when I feel myself shying away from something big. Let me tell you the story:
The "You Have to Say Yes" Bracelet:
In 2012, I was leading a retreat in Mexico. On our last day, I was walking on the beach with a student. We were reflecting on how much we had enjoyed our week and how incredibly complete we felt. I said the only thing I hadn't done, and wanted to do, was drink coconut milk from a fresh coconut and buy a silver bracelet for myself and my daughter. My student mentioned she had wanted to do those things, too, so we went off to hunt for the coconut vendor. We noticed the vendor wasn't selling coconuts where he had been the day before and we shrugged and thought it wasn't meant to be. We kept walking, enjoying the day, and just as we were about to turn around, we saw him and laughed because our "prayer had been answered".
We sat down to drink our yumminess and a silver vendor came up to us. Out of habit (and fear), we shooed him away with a "No, gracias". Then, after the third or fourth shooing, it occurred to me, "OMG, I am shooing away what I asked for!" I called him back, shopped with excitement and got a great deal on a bracelet for me (photo) and one for my soon to be 12 year old daughter, which he sized for her right there.
Upon reflection, I realized one of my fears was buying it from a street vendor. Street vendors are "cheats" and you can't trust them. Blah, blah, blah. My main fear was feeling I did not deserve it. It was a bit of a splurge. But in my moment of clarity, I felt "YES! I deserve this!!" and called the vendor back.
Pay Attention:
We do the same thing again and again! Pay attention to how you accept a compliment. Do you fully enjoy it and receive it graciously? Or do you push it away with a "Oh, it was nothing". How do you feel when you receive a gift without one to reciprocate? Do you feel you owe the person or do you fully receive it with love and enjoy it fully? Pay attention, you just might be surprised that you, too, push things away.
If you aren't ready to say yes, that is okay, just own it and know you will get another chance.
You might also enjoy...
Posted on 03/08/2013 at 06:00 AM in A Coaching Moment, Coaching Thought, Ignite Your Life, Inspirations, Life Coaching, Manifesting | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)
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Here's to taking Action and moving forward with your life!
You might also enjoy...
Peace and miracles to you!
Posted on 03/06/2013 at 06:18 AM in A Coaching Moment, Beliefs, Coaching Thought, Ignite Your Life, Life Coaching | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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When you are ready to make changes in your life, you need to know where you want to go. Goal setting is essential for moving forward in your life. Without goals, we tend to keep going on exactly as we have been, creating the same life we have always created.
In order to move forward, we need two types of goals to: Results-Oriented and Action-Oriented. Both are essential to our success.
RESULTS-ORIENTED GOALS: Results-Oriented Goals refer to the end result, what you want to create. Examples might be: lose 10 pounds, run a marathon, make $10,000 a month, buy a particular car, get married. These goals are essential to ultimate success because you can direct where you are headed.
ACTION-ORIENTED GOALS: Action-Oriented Goals are the specific actions you are going to take in order to achieve the results you want to achieve. Examples might be: exercise five times a week, eat three vegetables a day, seek one new business opportunity a month, attend one social event a week, etc.
Two more thoughts:
To your success!
Posted on 01/24/2013 at 10:30 PM in A Coaching Moment, Coaching Thought, Intention Setting | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
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