Laura Erdman-Luntz, MA, E-RYT(500) | Yoga | Yoga Teacher Training | Minnesota | Costa Rica | Life Coaching

Awaken to Joy Excerpt: People

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is the first paragraphs from the Chapter on People:

People

The people we choose to have in our lives can greatly affect how we communicate,
how we interact, and our overall outlook on life. 
In effect, they can often decide the balance between positive and negative inside of us.”

The people we choose to have in our lives can greatly affect how we communicate, how we interact and our overall outlook of life.  They can decide the balance between the positive and the negative inside of us.  We may not be aware of their effect, but in an unconscious state, it is guaranteed that some people will affect us strongly.  One minute we can be drawn into the excitement of one person, the next minute feeling the dissatisfaction and irritation of another.  We will use this chapter to become more aware of our interactions with others so we can use them to be more compassionate and joyful.

Do the people in your life bring more joy and compassion to you?  Do they leave you feeling energized and inspired?  For those who do not, what can you do to ensure they do not leave you feeling negative when you are with them?  We are going to look at this area of people interactions on a few different levels.  I encourage you to focus on the area that most resonates with you.  

 

Assignment:  

Step One:  Becoming more aware – How do people affect you?  Spend a week noticing the effect people have on your feeling of well-being.  This exercise can be quite illuminating.  Notice the people with whom you spend a lot of your time as well as the unfamiliar person who was standing in front of you in line at the grocery store.  What did you discover?

Peace,

Laura

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Need a Last Minute Gift? Give the Gift of Joy for the New Year

"In today's over-busy, over-fed, under-rested and competitive world, we all need the clear wisdom we find in Awaken to Joy.  Thanks, Laura, for showing the way."
~ Judith Hanson Lasater, Ph.D, PT

What if joy was tangible...with specific, easily defined steps you could take to create it for yourself?  It is!   What if we could shift our attitdue by just making some small changes in what we do in our every day? You can!  This book is your guide to helping you move beyond the ordinary and showing you how to:

• Bring greater peace into your life.   
• Be even more open and loving to your friends and family.
• Find harmony with your co-workers and joy in your work.
• Bring more patience, love, and compassion to your relationship with your spouse and children.

Now is the time to feel more joy in your life!

Order today and you can still get an autographed copy in time for Christmas! 
(It will be sent out on Monday morning.)  

THE BOOK

Awaken to Joy: The Book:  Enjoy Laura's first publication, Awaken to Joy.  You can purchase it from Amazon (or any online bookstore) or order a personalized, autographed copy directly from Laura.  Order here for the autographed copy: 

 

THE PROGRAM

Awaken to Joy Program-Full Year:  Enjoy a year of eNewsletters as Laura and fellow muse, Marya, take you through a year's study of the book.  $48  Register here.

Awaken to Joy Program-One Month: Enjoy one month of eNewsletters for the chapter on Judgment. $5  Register here.

FREE Year of Inspirational ENewsletters: Each week receive an inspirational quote and message from Laura.  Four weeks on each topic to get you through your year!  Register here.

 

FREE EBOOKS

10 Steps to Awakening the Joy Within You:  Read Marya's fabulous ebook and learn about ways we keep ourselves from discovering joy in the life we are already living!  Register here.  FREE

Initial Chapter: Focus and Awareness: Receive the first chapter for free!  Get yourself started.  This version of the first chapter includes deleted sections from the book, including Laura's view of joy (did you know it is tangible?)  You will also receive the two supporting Module Morsels with links to an Awaken to Joy radio show with Marya and Laura on the definition of joy!  Enjoy this first chapter and take a major step toward creating more joy in your life today!  Register here.  FREE

Here is the story about how and why Laura wrote this book.

Awaken to Joy Excerpt: Judgment

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is the first paragraphs from the Chapter on Judgment:

Judgment

When beginning to contemplate this topic, I looked judgment up in the dictionary to find out what its true definition is.  It merely means “to form an opinion or conclusion”.  Being able to “judge” a situation well, to form an opinion about whether it is good or bad for us, is an essential tool for our survival.  Yet there is a negative aspect to judging as well.

Reading further through the definition of “judge”, I found this entry: “sit in judgment”.  Its definition is to “assume the right to judge someone, especially in a critical matter”.  And there it is.  That is what we do when we judge in a negative way.  We assume the right to be critical of another. And, in the case of self-judgment, that person is us.  What happens when we critique another or ourselves negatively?  It depletes that positive well within us and deepens the negative.  In this chapter, we will investigate how judgment turned outward (judging others) and inward (self-judgment) affects our joy.

While I am still not sure if everyone engages in self-judgment (judgment turned inward), we all engage in outward judgment.  So if you are sitting there thinking “not me”, this month will be a chance for you to look at it more deeply.  We are frequently in a state of judgment.  We judge the weather; it is too cold, too hot, too humid.  We judge our children; they are too noisy, too fast, too messy.  We judge the traffic; it is too slow, too noisy, too much construction.  We judge when we shop; it is too expensive, too cheap, too bright. 

We are constantly assessing and evaluating what is in front of us and forming opinions.  The problem with this evaluation is that it narrows our vision and limits how we perceive the person, situation or idea that is in front of us.  The traffic, which is truly just a bunch of cars, becomes a nuisance, at best, and a source of fury, at worst, through the eyes of our judgment.  If the evaluation is negative, it also deepens the negative well within us.  Since we are working on being more expansive and broadening our perspective (moving up the building of consciousness), assessing anything from our judgmental position, which is based solely on our experiences, narrows our vision.  The narrower our vision, the harder it is for us to access our compassionate nature.

 

Assignment:  

Step One:  When do you Judge? Notice the starting point, “when do you judge” not “do you judge”.  We all judge and if you do not notice yours, that is where you need to begin. Come back to your Focus Area.  How is your judgment reflected there?

Peace,

Laura

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Awaken to Joy Excerpt: Spiritual Practice

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is a paragraph in the Chapter on Anger:

The Path of Our Anger 

My next step was to notice that my anger has a path it follows almost every time.  First, I feel impatience, then irritation and then anger.  Identifying the path helped me recognize when anger was coming.  When I begin to feel impatient, it is a signal to me to take care of it before it escalates.  Usually I can stop it before irritation comes, but I do not always have the energy to stop what feels like a runaway train in my heart.  Then I know I need to take care of other things in my life (we will look at those things in the coming chapters).

Often our reactions are merely habit from learned behavior.  Our parents or someone important to us reacted that way, and, therefore, it is all we know.  Do you know any other way to react in traffic than with frustration?  What about in the grocery store when you are in a hurry, took the time to find the shortest line, and then stood there “forever” while the clerk had to check the price on something?  What about when your child makes a mistake?  Is anger (irritation, impatience) the first place you go in these situations?  What did your parents do?  Can you begin to imagine a different, more compassionate path you might take?  One that would keep you connected to your joyful state?

Assignment:  

Step Two:  Is it a Habit? – Can you recall when you first learned this reaction?  If so, do you agree with the way that person reacted?  Do you truly feel the same way or is it just what you learned?

Peace,

Laura

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Awaken to Joy Excerpt: Spiritual Practice

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is the final paragraph in the Chapter on Spiritual Practice:

Is Your Practice Still Serving You?

If you already have some type of spiritual practice, whether or not it is based in a religious tradition, is your current practice serving you?  We all grow and evolve if we allow ourselves, and growth often means needing to change what we are doing.  We may remain in a practice long after we have outgrown it, either from fear of leaving or merely out of habit.  An outdated practice can actually keep us stuck in our current state of consciousness. It is a lot like being an athlete.  If you never increase or change your workouts, you will always remain at the same fitness level.  

Make a list of what you consider to be your practice.  When you do those things, are they fulfilling and leave you feeling connected, peaceful, contented?  The purpose of a practice is to get you more connected to your Higher Self (i.e., your compassionate, joyful, true nature).  Your practice may not do that for you anymore.  I find I regularly need to tweak my practice and occasionally it needs an overhaul.  With the practice of yoga, I can change my practice to balance my current life which helps me feel better.  I do these tweaks on a daily basis.  I needed to overhaul my practice when I changed my religious path from the one in which I was raised to one that matched my adult consciousness.  

 

Assignment:  

Step Two:  Identify Your Practice – Write down the details of your spiritual practice.  What do you do?  If you aren’t sure of what you do, begin to follow what was said in the chapter – what leaves you feeling fulfilled and more connected to your compassionate, joyful nature?  If you still are not sure, it is time to begin a search. Do any books beckon you to read them? What type of practice do your friends and family have, especially those whom you respect?  It may not be right for you, but it will be a good start.

Peace,

Laura

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Awaken to Joy Excerpt: Gratitude

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is the final paragraph in the Chapter on Gratitude:

The Power of Gratitude

Gratitude counters any negative state.  You cannot experience negativity and pure gratitude simultaneously.  There is a saying, “What you appreciate, appreciates!”  Meaning, what you are grateful for will grow in your life.  If you give thanks to your children for their positive, helpful behavior, you will get more of that behavior.  If you are grateful for your job you will feel more positive about doing it.  When you express gratitude, instead of a complaint, you shift your focus from negative to positive.  Gratitude opens the door to living graciously and gracefully.  Your Spirit is grateful.  When you feel gratitude, you are deeply connected to your higher self.

Assignment:  

Step Three:  Notice the Gratitudes – Twice each day, take a moment and look around you to find five things you are grateful for right in that moment.  Use your “remembrancer” to remind yourself.  (I like to do this one when I am alone in the car so I can actually say everything out loud.  I also emphasize why I am grateful for what I am noticing.  My feeling of joy soars!)

Peace,

Laura

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Awaken to Joy Excerpt: Joyful Communication

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  Each chapter includes four assignments, one a week for a month, so you can deepen your own understanding of the topic.  I include one here for your enjoyment.  From my heart to yours.  In joy, Laura)

Here is the first paragraph in the Chapter on Joyful Communication:

 

“I will listen to more than the words 

being spoken to me...

listen for the heart expression...

search out their meaning,

and then speak from my own heart.”

-Lance Wubbels 

 

I must admit this quote leaves me feeling finished.  It says it all.  Awakening the joy in our communication means learning to listen and speak from our heart – not our fears, needs, misunderstandings, blame, etc.  We can learn to communicate in a way that brings us closer to our heart or in a way that pushes us further away.  When we communicate with our hearts, we speak in a way that connects us to others, a connection we all crave.  
 

Assignment:  

Step Three:  Listen Imagine how listening better would feel.  Truly listening means not even formulating a reply as they speak.  In “coaching school” we discussed ways to stay present with clients to be sure we were really hearing them.  My favorite is to focus on my breathing, letting it be soft and flowing, while I listen.  Another technique is to repeat back to the speaker what you believe you heard.  In this step, focus on how well you listen.  Are you really understanding what they are actually saying or are you interpreting their words through your own perspective?

Peace,

Laura

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Awaken to Joy: Fear

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  From my heart to yours.  Enjoy!)

In this chapter, we will study an area that always leads us away from our joyful and authentic center: fear.  Fear has a purpose and is essential when something is in front of us from which we need to protect ourselves.  We need fear to get us moving quickly to fight or flee. 

 

But much of our fear is not in front of us, it is perceived, created in our mind and can often be unconscious so we are unaware of its existence and its effect on us.  We can carry our greatest fears with us all of them time, letting them run in the background of our minds, unconsciously leading us to feel more fearful and negative.  Fear can also immediately drain all of our energy and leave us more susceptible to negative thoughts and actions. 

 

This chapter is not about transforming fear, rather it is about educating ourselves around our fears so we no longer need to react from them.  (Although you may discover after a month of studying your unconscious fears, they do begin to transform themselves.  Once you make an unconscious issue conscious, it often loses its power.)

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Awaken to Joy: Anger

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  From my heart to yours.  Enjoy!)

If we feel anger, I firmly believe it should be expressed appropriately and not repressed.   But what if we could change whether or not we feel anger in certain situations in the first place?  When we learn about our own anger, its sources and how it unfolds in us, we can often change how we feel.  The more we can study our anger, the more we can understand the emotion and transform it.  This work is not about denying the anger we do have; it is about cultivating the compassion within us so that the anger we have is transformed.  But anger can be so devious, sneaking into our consciousness in its various forms –frustration, impatience, irritation, jealousy, resentment or hatred – without us even noticing until we are deeply into the emotion.  How can we begin to cultivate our consciousness around it before we are already entrenched?  The more we learn about our anger, the easier it is to choose a different course.

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Awaken to Joy: The Prologue

(Here is an excerpt from my book, Awaken to Joy.  From my heart to yours.  Enjoy!)

Prologue:  This story is where I began my own journey toward writing this book...

Years ago I read a quote that changed my life.  To paraphrase, “If you squeeze an orange you get orange juice. When you are squeezed, what comes out?”  Right after I had my second child, I was being squeezed and I did not like what was coming out. I was exhausted and my 2½ year-old daughter was finding it very challenging to adjust to sharing her mom. With all of this in my world, I found myself “losing it” more than I liked. Moments of complete lack of patience, filled with irritation. I expressed sadness and frustration to my family and friends. Their responses were always a variation of, “You are tired. It is to be expected.” Or “All parents experience moments of sheer frustration. It just means you are normal.” These responses did not satisfy or pacify me. Perhaps it was the perfectionist in me, but normal wasn’t good enough for me and, frankly, I did not feel it was “normal”. I wanted my children to have a joyful, blissful childhood marked by a mom who was grounded in love, joy, and compassion. I was not feeling grounded and I was not feeling in touch with my soul.  I had also heard that I could expect to be tired for at least 18 years.  I needed to do something else.  A question kept coming up for me from the book Nonviolent Communication, written by Marshall B. Rosenberg: “What allows some people to stay connected to their compassionate nature under even the most trying circumstances?” I knew it was possible.  I knew I could stay connected to my compassionate, joyful nature.  So, what was I not doing?

As I began to look inside myself, curious as to why I was losing it when I did, I made some connections between those moments and other things. I noticed that many of these moments were preceded by thoughts marked by fear. Generally these thoughts were around my big fear in life – financial instability – and had nothing to do with my children. But they were enough to sap me of my energy and drain my love, joy, and compassion. I also noticed other variables contributed to my negativity as well such as what I watched on television, what I ate, people with whom I interacted, what I chose to read in my free time.

I then turned to what would create more love, joy, and compassion in my heart. I did not want to just control the negativity; I wanted to eradicate the seed. I wanted compassion and love to be what came out the next time I was squeezed. I evaluated my spiritual practice and other disciplines I maintained.  I discovered some of those disciplines, ostensibly used to foster my connection with myself, were done out of fear and not love; because I felt I should be doing them.  I also began to consciously fill myself with love, let go of judgment of others and myself, and open myself up to the loving support of others.

When I began this journey, I did not connect it to the greater works of the well-known teachers of compassion and love, such as Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Theresa, etc. It felt like such a small piece of work, simply working on my relationship with my children. I realize now that that is where it begins. The small changes we make within ourselves create a ripple effect within us, that affects those around us and, in turn, the consciousness of the world. As I worked on my relationship with my children, I evolved as an individual. I became a kinder, more loving wife, daughter, sister, friend, Life Coach and Yoga Educator. I also know I am guiding two much more joyful, compassionate and loving souls into the world than my old self would have and I cannot even begin to guess the effect I have had on others along the way who have then gone on to affect others.  Yes, we all affect the consciousness of the world through the ripple out effect.  Awaken to Joy can improve what is rippling out from you!

It is the work I did (and am doing) that I present to you here. May you end your study with more joy, more love in your heart, and living more in harmony with your Higher Self.

Peace,

Laura

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